Friday, July 9, 2010

Wanting God's Will!

As I look at myself, I'm amazed at what God has done in me. He has transformed me. Just a few years ago, I was a "worry-wart"! Constantly worried about what is about to happen, what might happen or even what I was going to have to do to make my way happen. But, then God started changing me.

It took having my safety net stripped away! Jeff lost his job. He's been laid off before, but never when we had 3 kids! At first I was depending on what we had in checking account, but as the month stretched into two, I couldn't depend on what we had. I had to start depending on God to provide. And boy did He! Somehow we didn't default on anything & the money stretched in unexplainable ways!

Then Jeff got a job & things returned to normal & I started depending on myself & Jeff & what we could do. But things got stressful & Hubby felt led to take another job. And that job led to the biggest change in me.

After praying about this new job offer, we felt this was where God wanted Jeff. So, we jumped into it. Although, I was scared to death over the thought of him traveling & me being a single mom during the week. Over the last almost 2 years, God has been changing me. I've become more dependent on Him! I'm not sure exactly how or when it happened, but I'm just amazed that it has!

I wake up every morning content! I know to whom I belong! I know God has me in this place for a reason! I don't really like Jeff traveling & being away from us, but I'm ok with it. I know God is in control & He put us on this path. I pray for Jeff to get a local job, but if it's not God's will, then I don't want it to happen!! And that thought is exactly what amazes me! I'm at a point where I want God's will more than my own!